MOTHERS IN FILM
An exploration into the role of mothers in film. From the sacrificial to the absent.
The Good, the bad, & the ugly
Words By: Arcy Hawks
Society and cultures expectation of what a "good mother" should be and when they are not.
Most of our Mother's Edits reflect on our mothers and my role as a mother. This edit dives a bit into the role of mom in films. The Good, Bad, and the Ugly.
Mothers in film are depicted in many ways, from the June Cleaverish type to the Mommie Dearest type. I think, at times, we all fall into both categories because being a mother is complicated. We would never want to admit that we can be both. We want to be the perfect mother, like Marmie in Little Women or Diane Keaton in The Family Stone—warm, caring, but firm.
Some days, I feel like the mother in Ladybird. I am tough and honest, hoping this will make my kids resilient, but it only brings resentment. Most of the time, if I could, I would be more like Dorothea Fields in Twentieth Century Women. She's no-nonsense but open to giving my kids experiences and letting them figure it out. But she's not warm and fuzzy, like Molly Weasley. I bet she smells like apple pie or Sally Fields' character in Steel Magnolias.
The truth of it all is we are not movie moms. We are real moms. We want to give our children love, security, and independence. This is a mixed bag of tug-of-war. On the one hand, we want them to be their own person; this means leaving us and finding their way. Mistakes and all. Skinned knees, broken hearts, and insecurities. Bad decisions, significant accomplishments, and uncertain futures. This is life. We can't shelter them, nor should we ever. This is the internal conflict of a mother.
Being a perfect mother is an urban myth. I made mistakes and will most likely make more. I hope my children know I love them and always want the best for them. The one thing I know for sure is they are kind; honestly, that is all I could hope for.
Happy Mother's day to the Good, Bad, and Ugly moms out there who are trying their best. You got this. On one hand, we want them to be their own person; this means leaving us and finding their way.
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